Now that I find my days at Cranesbill Books dwindling, I'm officially in transition, but that's okay. Anywhere is better than the places I've been in since I last blogged.
On January 20, 2009, I thought that I would be nudging the bookstore along forever. On December 9, 2009, I'm only two days away from being an ex-retailer, having liquidated most of my stock and announced the impending finale over the past two months. It was a war of attrition: fewer sales, fewer items in stock, fewer staffers, fewer hopes of success, fewer plans for the future. When I add up the situation, there's no avoiding the conclusion that I did all I could.
In every way, this is not an isolated event. While everyone who visited the store knows that we tried to be a perfect bookstore; instead, we finally succumbed to a perfect storm. Other stores that I admired have recently fallen to the economy, to the relentless competition of both internet and bricks-and-mortar enterprises, and to a publishing industry that did not reward independence.
So now I am unemployed, unattached to any purposeful activity other than job hunting. Partly frightening and partly exhilarating, I negotiate job listings, hopeful signs of survival, personal fears, friendly suggestions, and encouragement from those who care enough to comment. I have years of experience; I work hard at whatever I do; I never assume that a problem cannot be solved. So somehow I believe that I will land on my feet.
Continuing to write here through this period in my life is one way to share my experience and to force myself to maintain a public voice. Because winning isn't everything, and defeat creates new paths and possibilities, I hope you will be interested in what I have to say.
December 9, 2009
January 20, 2009
At A Moment of Transformation
At A Moment of Transformation
When I stood behind the counter in the days approaching the holidays, I was so honored to hear your comments about the value of my store in this community. A month earlier, in the dog days of October and November, I had seriously wondered whether the struggle was worth it. Lots of small businesses have given up, especially bookstores. How could I ever survive?
Most owners have invested heavily and put their own welfare at risk to continue in such tough times. Even with good community support, small stores have been an endangered species. I have heard that our holiday sale announced to some that we would be closing. In my mind, it was a way to mimic the large retailers and to salvage a year that was not as healthy as we had hoped. But in a small town, everything is open to interpretation.
Let me skip forward to the morning on which I am writing this blog. The inauguration will take place and I will be at the store, watching it on my trusty laptop. You can’t help being hopeful and optimistic. Even though things could get much worse, and likely will get somewhat worse, the worst can be survived. In that spirit, Cranesbill will go forward, with some changes and improvements, some experiments, and a lot of faith in our customers.
Last week, when the U.S.Air pilot landed so skillfully in the Hudson River, I thought of how much it takes to deal with the unexpected. We never expected the kind of economic downturn that ended last year. Michigan has had tougher times than many other places, and sometimes, when I have traveled elsewhere, I’ve felt that the rest of the country didn’t understand what we were going through. We were the people for whom the question of whether or not we were in a recession was more like a joke than a news story.
The miraculous series of events that saved lives was a good parable for what we as a community need to achieve. Continuing to support a downtown, a wider business community, and the cultural institutions that have developed and been supported over the years by the whole community is not equivalent to saving 155 lives, but it may require the same kind of skill and a series of best-case scenarios that emerged from the plane crash. I don’t know how it will be done, but I will do my best; thanks to all of you who have supported us no matter what our human failings. And may we all create that series of miracles that will help us continue our presence no matter how much tougher things get.
When I stood behind the counter in the days approaching the holidays, I was so honored to hear your comments about the value of my store in this community. A month earlier, in the dog days of October and November, I had seriously wondered whether the struggle was worth it. Lots of small businesses have given up, especially bookstores. How could I ever survive?
Most owners have invested heavily and put their own welfare at risk to continue in such tough times. Even with good community support, small stores have been an endangered species. I have heard that our holiday sale announced to some that we would be closing. In my mind, it was a way to mimic the large retailers and to salvage a year that was not as healthy as we had hoped. But in a small town, everything is open to interpretation.
Let me skip forward to the morning on which I am writing this blog. The inauguration will take place and I will be at the store, watching it on my trusty laptop. You can’t help being hopeful and optimistic. Even though things could get much worse, and likely will get somewhat worse, the worst can be survived. In that spirit, Cranesbill will go forward, with some changes and improvements, some experiments, and a lot of faith in our customers.
Last week, when the U.S.Air pilot landed so skillfully in the Hudson River, I thought of how much it takes to deal with the unexpected. We never expected the kind of economic downturn that ended last year. Michigan has had tougher times than many other places, and sometimes, when I have traveled elsewhere, I’ve felt that the rest of the country didn’t understand what we were going through. We were the people for whom the question of whether or not we were in a recession was more like a joke than a news story.
The miraculous series of events that saved lives was a good parable for what we as a community need to achieve. Continuing to support a downtown, a wider business community, and the cultural institutions that have developed and been supported over the years by the whole community is not equivalent to saving 155 lives, but it may require the same kind of skill and a series of best-case scenarios that emerged from the plane crash. I don’t know how it will be done, but I will do my best; thanks to all of you who have supported us no matter what our human failings. And may we all create that series of miracles that will help us continue our presence no matter how much tougher things get.
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